Karma..."What goes around comes around." That's what they say. (Who is they?) The older I get the more I believe in this. There are so many mottoes, life phrases, colloquialisms, whatever you want to call them, that go along with this whole karma theory, which is based I think, on the biblical classic - "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
"Patience is a virtue" goes right along with my favorite, "if you give someone enough rope they will hang themselves." Imagine if you will, that I LOVE to be right?!? Who doesn't? I have spent years remaining diligently patient and handing out rope while waiting for someone to hang himself. Might I say the noose is getting very, very tight. I am INSANELY HAPPY my patience is paying off. Bonus - I have taken the high road, which is not always easy. I have treated this person the way I would prefer to be treated. Since this person refuses to treat me this way, I feel as though the universe has finally said "enough!" I am feeling very justified by my friend Karma.
I know people who feel if you believe in karma then you can't believe in God. That karma is kinda of like slapping God in the face with your lack of faith. I do not feel this way. Whose to say that karma is not God's way of being there for people who aren't quite sure about Him, on the cusp so to speak? Quietly proving himself in a way that these people can understand, patiently and gently nurturing their faith.
I would never claim to know what God is thinking, but I do know that he is patient and kind and just. Like a father should be. In my experience there are people that would prefer to not think of the just part. They only want a nice God. Justification and punishment are what keeps the world in order. I believe that justification and punishment are karma.
I do not currently attend a church, although I have in the past. I am a deeply spiritual person who does not feel it necessary to go to church and sit with a bunch of people who love God only on Sunday. Be clear, I do not think that all church goers are this way but, "it only takes one bad apple to spoil the whole cart", right?! I know I am not the only one who feels this way. I have personally spoken with and led several people to Christ who left the church because of the hypocrisy they experienced there. I love my God with a force that is not to be reckoned with!
Please be aware that the opinions expressed here are exactly that. My personal opinions and thoughts and are not written to offend anyone. Thank you for reading.
WonderWoman
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Friday, October 1, 2010
Climbing the Rope
It occurred to me today that life is kind of like climbing a rope. Some days you can see the top. You can't wait to get there! You are full of energy! Oh the things you can do and see when you get to the top! Other days it's all you can do to just hold on, clinging tightly till your hands bleed, swinging in the wind.
Do you remember having to climb the rope in gym class? I dreaded the rope. I have the weakest arms ever created in the entire history of the universe. I can remember in 6th grade we had to do some presidential fitness BS, and I couldn't do one pull-up. Everyone had to do one. The WHOLE class is standing around, because of course, I was last. So they are all waiting for me to get done, and the teacher was all "Come on, you can do one can't ya'?" No, apparently I could not. I recall being rather humiliated. - Then in middle school we had to climb the rope. I knew I was DOOMED! I couldn't even get on the rope, let alone climb it. To make matters worse I had developed a healthy fear of heights by this time. (PETRIFIED would be putting it mildly) I don't really remember how, but somehow I got out of climbing that rope. I think maybe the teacher turned around and I got some friends to lie and say I climbed it when he wasn't looking, maybe I was humiliated and I've blocked it out?! It doesn't matter now. I, literally, have never had a need to climb a rope in my entire life. Not really sure who does, but it ain't me!
Figuratively, I have climbed a million miles of rope. I can honestly say I was always glad when I made it to the top, but I often thought that I would never get there. When you are buried in a situation you can't see your way out of, you just have to hold on. Tomorrow is always going to come and bring new things. You will get to the top before you know it, and once you get there you will wonder why you thought it would be so hard. Holding on is hard, but it is always worth it. There will always be more rope to climb, but it takes real strength to hang on and swing in the wind, while waiting for tomorrow and the new attitude it might bring...
WonderWoman
Do you remember having to climb the rope in gym class? I dreaded the rope. I have the weakest arms ever created in the entire history of the universe. I can remember in 6th grade we had to do some presidential fitness BS, and I couldn't do one pull-up. Everyone had to do one. The WHOLE class is standing around, because of course, I was last. So they are all waiting for me to get done, and the teacher was all "Come on, you can do one can't ya'?" No, apparently I could not. I recall being rather humiliated. - Then in middle school we had to climb the rope. I knew I was DOOMED! I couldn't even get on the rope, let alone climb it. To make matters worse I had developed a healthy fear of heights by this time. (PETRIFIED would be putting it mildly) I don't really remember how, but somehow I got out of climbing that rope. I think maybe the teacher turned around and I got some friends to lie and say I climbed it when he wasn't looking, maybe I was humiliated and I've blocked it out?! It doesn't matter now. I, literally, have never had a need to climb a rope in my entire life. Not really sure who does, but it ain't me!
Figuratively, I have climbed a million miles of rope. I can honestly say I was always glad when I made it to the top, but I often thought that I would never get there. When you are buried in a situation you can't see your way out of, you just have to hold on. Tomorrow is always going to come and bring new things. You will get to the top before you know it, and once you get there you will wonder why you thought it would be so hard. Holding on is hard, but it is always worth it. There will always be more rope to climb, but it takes real strength to hang on and swing in the wind, while waiting for tomorrow and the new attitude it might bring...
WonderWoman
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
My Babies got Skills!
The other day my daughter wanted to make a pie, which of course prompted my other daughter to want to make one as well. I really wasn't up to it, but I decided to go ahead and let them give it a whirl. I figured it would be, at the least, an amusing time. They made a pumpkin and an apple pie. What do you know? My girls know how to make pie! I really didn't do anything but a little prompting here and there. They rolled the dough and peeled the apples and everything! It was remarkable!
I don't know where they learned this skill. They have helped me and my Mom make pies before, but I didn't realize they could do it all by themselves. It is amazing how much they have absorbed over the years. Maybe it is a natural born skill? I have no idea, but I think it is AWESOME!
Does it appear from this blog that I don't know anything about my children? It does seem as though I am in a constant state of amazement and awe over the things they can do. The truth is I just think of them as little and helpless. I know they are not, and I am glad about that. But in the back of my mind they are just babies - laying there waiting to be picked up and fed. The feeding part hasn't changed, at least once very thirty minutes I hear, "I am hungry when are we eating!".
I have been accused of not giving my kids enough responsibility, doing too much for them. I want them to be kids. I don't want them to have too much to do. Isn't that what being an adult is about? That will happen soon enough. My children are ungrateful brats just like all the other children of the universe, but when I really need them they are there. They have skills. It is not like they have never washed a dish, or a load of clothes, or mowed the lawn. They have, and they can do it well when they need to. And I just don't feel the need to say this is your job, do it over and over so I don't have to, unless I really need the help. Is it so wrong of me to want my kids to be kids for as long as possible?! This is why I am always so thrilled when I realize that they can do things like make a pie without my help. They have skills, and just because I don't require them to use those skills on a regular basis doesn't mean they don't have them.
I don't know where they learned this skill. They have helped me and my Mom make pies before, but I didn't realize they could do it all by themselves. It is amazing how much they have absorbed over the years. Maybe it is a natural born skill? I have no idea, but I think it is AWESOME!
Does it appear from this blog that I don't know anything about my children? It does seem as though I am in a constant state of amazement and awe over the things they can do. The truth is I just think of them as little and helpless. I know they are not, and I am glad about that. But in the back of my mind they are just babies - laying there waiting to be picked up and fed. The feeding part hasn't changed, at least once very thirty minutes I hear, "I am hungry when are we eating!".
I have been accused of not giving my kids enough responsibility, doing too much for them. I want them to be kids. I don't want them to have too much to do. Isn't that what being an adult is about? That will happen soon enough. My children are ungrateful brats just like all the other children of the universe, but when I really need them they are there. They have skills. It is not like they have never washed a dish, or a load of clothes, or mowed the lawn. They have, and they can do it well when they need to. And I just don't feel the need to say this is your job, do it over and over so I don't have to, unless I really need the help. Is it so wrong of me to want my kids to be kids for as long as possible?! This is why I am always so thrilled when I realize that they can do things like make a pie without my help. They have skills, and just because I don't require them to use those skills on a regular basis doesn't mean they don't have them.
Friday, September 24, 2010
Pride and the Common Enemy
Today I saw something I never thought I would - All four of my kids got on the same school bus. Now this may seem silly and certainly not an impossibility, but it conjured up emotion in me I really did not expect. First of all my oldest is a senior, and 17, so you know, he NEVER rides the bus. "GOD MOM - What is wrong with you? Seniors don't ride the bus!" Which I know is not true, but apparently being cool in high school is a REALLY big deal! So for whatever reason his ride bailed on him this morning and he had to take the bus. Secondly, my youngest is 10 and in 5th grade. She however had her first day of band today. Her practice is before her regularly scheduled elementary school time and at the middle school. (The high school and middle school kids ride the same bus) So she was taking the early bus to school today. I have two other children, one attends the middle school and one is a sophomore and attends the high school as well. So that is how they all ended up on the same bus.
Firstly this whole situation required military like co-ordinance to get everyone up and out the door in less than one hour. The amount of begging I had to do to get 2 of my kids to give up five minutes of bathroom time so that their younger sister could get ten minutes in the bathroom was really something to behold. Is it so hard to be nice to your little sister?! I guess it is. Plus I got to hear this little gem from my inconsiderate spawn as well - "You know Mom, band is so NOT COOL, you shouldn't let her do it, all the other kids are just going to make fun of her...you are not doing her any favors." Really?! Anything to get what they want, Amazing!
So after surviving all of this drama, I watch my children trot down the driveway together. They all look happy. They are smiling and laughing and goofing around. They are telling my youngest not to worry about riding the bus with the older kids, they will take care of her. I am so proud! They care about each other. They may not admit it in front of me, but they do, and it THRILLS me to watch this. I don't care that probably what unifies them the most is they have a common enemy - ME. I don't mind this one bit.
As the bus pulls up I wave from the window and wipe a tear from my eye. Now I know that when I am no longer here, my kids will be alright because they have each other!
WonderWoman
Firstly this whole situation required military like co-ordinance to get everyone up and out the door in less than one hour. The amount of begging I had to do to get 2 of my kids to give up five minutes of bathroom time so that their younger sister could get ten minutes in the bathroom was really something to behold. Is it so hard to be nice to your little sister?! I guess it is. Plus I got to hear this little gem from my inconsiderate spawn as well - "You know Mom, band is so NOT COOL, you shouldn't let her do it, all the other kids are just going to make fun of her...you are not doing her any favors." Really?! Anything to get what they want, Amazing!
So after surviving all of this drama, I watch my children trot down the driveway together. They all look happy. They are smiling and laughing and goofing around. They are telling my youngest not to worry about riding the bus with the older kids, they will take care of her. I am so proud! They care about each other. They may not admit it in front of me, but they do, and it THRILLS me to watch this. I don't care that probably what unifies them the most is they have a common enemy - ME. I don't mind this one bit.
As the bus pulls up I wave from the window and wipe a tear from my eye. Now I know that when I am no longer here, my kids will be alright because they have each other!
WonderWoman
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
My Mom, The Hair Goddess!!!
I was at my Mother's house yesterday getting my hair done. This may seem like an odd thing to say to some, but my Mom used to do hair for a living so it is not strange for me. She has been fixing, and sometimes messing up, my hair for my entire life. The first time I had a perm I was 5. My Mom LOVES to play with hair and make-up! Much more than the average person. I personally dislike it a lot. It is a good thing that she drilled it in to me how important it is to take care of my skin and hair until it became a really good habit. Otherwise who knows what I would look like most of the time. I am the epitome of what some would call "low maintenance"!
I used to hate that all my friends would get to go to the salon and get their hair done while I had to sit on a stool in the kitchen and get my hair cut - by my Mother! I selfishly wanted to be like all of my friends. I had no idea how lucky I was. When I was 16 my Mom gave me a perm that, shall we say, went very badly. It wasn't her fault, these things happen, but as a teenager I pretty much blamed her for everything, go figure, and this was no exception. I ended up going to the salon and having all of my hair cut very short. Short hair was in and it ended up being a good thing. But at the time I was very upset and I didn't let her near my hair for a long time.
As I got older and had children and got poorer it became necessary for me to use my Mother's hair expertise in order to avoid looking like - in her words - "A Mountain Woman". You can picture that anyway you want to, no matter how you do, it ain't good! I discovered that she was pretty good, and willing to do whatever I wanted. And, she saved me a ton of money. Do you know how much it cost to get a haircut and perm these days? About $100.00! So to have her do it for the price of a couple of pizzas is a pretty good plan.
Now there are disadvantages to doing this in your kitchen. First and foremost, the kids teasing you about how you look, and complaining about the smell. You never want to give your kids ammunition, trust me on that one! But the worst part is having to stand bent over the kitchen sink for what seems like endless amounts of time, rinsing your hair. There is no chair that reclines and a sink with a space cut out for your neck. As a child I can remember laying on the counter with my head in the sink, but I don't think that would work so well now. So my wallet is happy, but my neck is not.
It is still worth it, because the absolute best part about all of this is, spending time with my Mom. She makes me laugh and it makes her happy to help me and make me look good. So all the way around it is a win-win situation! Thanks Mom!
I used to hate that all my friends would get to go to the salon and get their hair done while I had to sit on a stool in the kitchen and get my hair cut - by my Mother! I selfishly wanted to be like all of my friends. I had no idea how lucky I was. When I was 16 my Mom gave me a perm that, shall we say, went very badly. It wasn't her fault, these things happen, but as a teenager I pretty much blamed her for everything, go figure, and this was no exception. I ended up going to the salon and having all of my hair cut very short. Short hair was in and it ended up being a good thing. But at the time I was very upset and I didn't let her near my hair for a long time.
As I got older and had children and got poorer it became necessary for me to use my Mother's hair expertise in order to avoid looking like - in her words - "A Mountain Woman". You can picture that anyway you want to, no matter how you do, it ain't good! I discovered that she was pretty good, and willing to do whatever I wanted. And, she saved me a ton of money. Do you know how much it cost to get a haircut and perm these days? About $100.00! So to have her do it for the price of a couple of pizzas is a pretty good plan.
Now there are disadvantages to doing this in your kitchen. First and foremost, the kids teasing you about how you look, and complaining about the smell. You never want to give your kids ammunition, trust me on that one! But the worst part is having to stand bent over the kitchen sink for what seems like endless amounts of time, rinsing your hair. There is no chair that reclines and a sink with a space cut out for your neck. As a child I can remember laying on the counter with my head in the sink, but I don't think that would work so well now. So my wallet is happy, but my neck is not.
It is still worth it, because the absolute best part about all of this is, spending time with my Mom. She makes me laugh and it makes her happy to help me and make me look good. So all the way around it is a win-win situation! Thanks Mom!
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
My Critical Opinion
I am finding it a lot harder than I had thought to find time to write on here. I am trying hard. The weekends are incredibly difficult. Especially when I have my nose buried in the Twilight book series! I put off reading it for a long time. I like to read a series quickly, one right after the other. I hate to have to wait 6 months for the next book to be released. As you can tell, patience is not one of my virtues! So in 4 days I read the first 2 books of the series. I have enjoyed them immensely. OBVIOUSLY! They are intriguing yet very light and easy to read, maybe because they are marketed towards teenagers and I am 40?! I also spent some time with the family over the weekend. We watched the movie Avatar together. Everyone seemed to enjoy it. It had something all could enjoy.
I think both of the stories are solid. They contain all the right elements to be hits. Action, Drama, Romance, and Suspense. They are both developed from the classic good versus evil theme. It is remarkable how well this type of story always sells, but it does. While the vampire books are well written, I did not find them thought provoking. This was part of the appeal for me. Avatar on the other hand has stayed with me for 2 days. I find it represents the attitude of American society very well. The idea that we can pretty much do whatever we want. If we want something we can just offer what we think is a fair price and then if we are refused, we can just take it by force. I find this sad. This is not something new. It is what happened to the Native Americans. I guess Americans have a reputation throughout the world as being rude. I wonder why? How inconsiderate can we be?
I know it is only a movie but, these are things I have only begun to think about in recent years. Dare I say - as I have gotten older? Maybe the reason Americans are so selfish and rude is because we are a pretty young nation? We haven't learned our lesson yet? Feels like I am making excuses now. I don't know why these things happen. I do think we have become a more tolerant society over the course of my generation, but I don't think we are any less arrogant. All I do know is that I still love my country even if it isn't perfect.
I think both of the stories are solid. They contain all the right elements to be hits. Action, Drama, Romance, and Suspense. They are both developed from the classic good versus evil theme. It is remarkable how well this type of story always sells, but it does. While the vampire books are well written, I did not find them thought provoking. This was part of the appeal for me. Avatar on the other hand has stayed with me for 2 days. I find it represents the attitude of American society very well. The idea that we can pretty much do whatever we want. If we want something we can just offer what we think is a fair price and then if we are refused, we can just take it by force. I find this sad. This is not something new. It is what happened to the Native Americans. I guess Americans have a reputation throughout the world as being rude. I wonder why? How inconsiderate can we be?
I know it is only a movie but, these are things I have only begun to think about in recent years. Dare I say - as I have gotten older? Maybe the reason Americans are so selfish and rude is because we are a pretty young nation? We haven't learned our lesson yet? Feels like I am making excuses now. I don't know why these things happen. I do think we have become a more tolerant society over the course of my generation, but I don't think we are any less arrogant. All I do know is that I still love my country even if it isn't perfect.
Friday, September 10, 2010
Action and Reaction
Hello Again,
So one of the things I say a lot, and firmly believe is "If you want to change someone's reaction, you have to change your own actions". The first time I heard this I was completely blown away. I also didn't think it would work. People consistently do and say the same things and expect to get different results. I have heard that this is the definition of stupidity. I don't know that I agree with that. Mostly I think its just human nature. It is like trying to sweep up a string with the vacuum cleaner, no matter how many times you go over it, it just lays there, mocking you. I am quite sure we have all done that. I know I have. Comedians have made entire routines around this exact concept.
It all involves taking a proactive approach to a situation as opposed to a reactive approach. What this means is, instead of waiting for someone else to do something for you to react to, do something first. Be the one to cause the reaction, because then you have more control over the situation. If no one pays attention to you when you yell, stop, just whisper. Watch what happens! This worked wonders with my kids a few years ago.
Another example is, when someone you often go to the movies with invites you, and when they drive you are always late, not late enough to miss the movie per se, but late enough to miss the previews, which you enjoy a lot. OFFER TO DRIVE!!! Don't wait for them to offer and then be late so that you can spend the entire movie being angry because you missed the previews! Take matters into your own hands! Control your own destiny! Thank you YODA.
Now I know that I am a radical control freak. This will come as no surprise to anyone who knows me at all. Some people may think that this is just a way to manipulate a situation to your own advantage, and maybe it is. Would that be so awful? Especially if the other person doesn't really care one way or the other who drives? I think not. Why shouldn't you fix a problem to your advantage? It's better than suffering lingering consequences because you didn't.
I am such a control freak that my husband must be a saint. I swear. I become physically ill when it appears that I may not be early. Not late, or even on time, but EARLY! When we go to the grocery store together and he puts the groceries on the belt, I can't watch. This is NOT a joke. I like to put them in a certain order, cold things with other cold things, eggs and bread last (so they don't get smashed), personal items separate from the food, and so on... He just flings it up there with out looking. I am sweating by the time I get to the car. Now it makes no difference at all how it goes on the belt or gets bagged, it all gets thrown in the car and taken home and put away just the same. I know this, which is why I try not to say anything. Only he knows me so well he can tell I am climbing out of my skin and recently he just looked at me and said, "Why don't I just hand you the stuff and you can put it on the belt?" Not sarcastically, just doesn't want me to be crazy. What a guy!
So maybe I am a control freak, but I am conscious of it. Is it so wrong for me to pass on my manipulative skills for you to use to make your life easier?! I think not!
Wonder Woman
So one of the things I say a lot, and firmly believe is "If you want to change someone's reaction, you have to change your own actions". The first time I heard this I was completely blown away. I also didn't think it would work. People consistently do and say the same things and expect to get different results. I have heard that this is the definition of stupidity. I don't know that I agree with that. Mostly I think its just human nature. It is like trying to sweep up a string with the vacuum cleaner, no matter how many times you go over it, it just lays there, mocking you. I am quite sure we have all done that. I know I have. Comedians have made entire routines around this exact concept.
It all involves taking a proactive approach to a situation as opposed to a reactive approach. What this means is, instead of waiting for someone else to do something for you to react to, do something first. Be the one to cause the reaction, because then you have more control over the situation. If no one pays attention to you when you yell, stop, just whisper. Watch what happens! This worked wonders with my kids a few years ago.
Another example is, when someone you often go to the movies with invites you, and when they drive you are always late, not late enough to miss the movie per se, but late enough to miss the previews, which you enjoy a lot. OFFER TO DRIVE!!! Don't wait for them to offer and then be late so that you can spend the entire movie being angry because you missed the previews! Take matters into your own hands! Control your own destiny! Thank you YODA.
Now I know that I am a radical control freak. This will come as no surprise to anyone who knows me at all. Some people may think that this is just a way to manipulate a situation to your own advantage, and maybe it is. Would that be so awful? Especially if the other person doesn't really care one way or the other who drives? I think not. Why shouldn't you fix a problem to your advantage? It's better than suffering lingering consequences because you didn't.
I am such a control freak that my husband must be a saint. I swear. I become physically ill when it appears that I may not be early. Not late, or even on time, but EARLY! When we go to the grocery store together and he puts the groceries on the belt, I can't watch. This is NOT a joke. I like to put them in a certain order, cold things with other cold things, eggs and bread last (so they don't get smashed), personal items separate from the food, and so on... He just flings it up there with out looking. I am sweating by the time I get to the car. Now it makes no difference at all how it goes on the belt or gets bagged, it all gets thrown in the car and taken home and put away just the same. I know this, which is why I try not to say anything. Only he knows me so well he can tell I am climbing out of my skin and recently he just looked at me and said, "Why don't I just hand you the stuff and you can put it on the belt?" Not sarcastically, just doesn't want me to be crazy. What a guy!
So maybe I am a control freak, but I am conscious of it. Is it so wrong for me to pass on my manipulative skills for you to use to make your life easier?! I think not!
Wonder Woman
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